Thursday, December 29, 2011


I am in love with Skyscraper by Demi Lovato. This song just empowers me. It floods back to my mind the memories of my past. This song is beautiful and fills my soul with the peace of knowing that I am overcoming my past. I have a long way to go, but I am on the path of overcoming. It will take a lifetime to overcome everything, and I know that I will not be able to fully overcome everything in this life, but I can grow and learn from my experiences in life. I can let my experiences overtake me, or I can overtake my experiences.

I put the song on my #1 spot on my playlist located at the bottom of my blog if you're interested in hearing the words. I love the whole song, but the chorus is my favorite:
"Do you have to make me feel like there is nothing left of me
You can take everything I have
You can break everything I am
Like I'm made of glass
Like I'm made of paper
Go on and try to tear me down
I will be rising from the ground
Like a skyscraper"

I know the wrong doings that I have done that have caused much hurt and pain, but I also know the wrong doings that have been done unto me that have caused me much hurt and pain. I am thankful for my experiences as they have helped me learn and grow more than I ever thought possible. I now see life in a different light. It has a new beautiful, profound meaning to it.

I have so much I want to blog about, I just haven't made the time to blog about it.
I have created a new blog, I just haven't done anything with it yet. I am hoping to keep the new blog focused on deeper thoughts, and give more of an insight to the inner, deeper, passionate side of me, and keep this blog focused on my family.

Stay tuned for these upcoming blog posts:
Marshall's 8th birthday
Marshall meeting his biological father for the first time since he was 2
The Polar Express
Dance recital
Tumbling fun
and stay tuned for something that I have been wanting to post for a long time..... sorry, that's all the information I'm willing to give for now. 

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas!

Friday, December 23, 2011

Sleep is overrated..... right?

I wanted to post about my son's 8 birthday, but I didn't. I wanted to post about my son seeing his biological father for the first time since he was 2, but I didn't. I wanted to post about my favorite Christmas decorations on our tree, but I didn't. I wanted to pass out some yummy treats to all of my neighbors, friends and family here in town, but I didn't. I wanted to go over my budget, but I didn't. I wanted to get some sleep the past few nights, but I didn't. I wanted to stay home and relax on Christmas Eve with my family, but I can't. I wanted to make some changes to my traditional Christmas dinner this year, but I won't. This year I wanted to do an elegant, candle lit dinner for our family Christmas dinner, but I won't. I wanted all of my kids to feel bright and cheery on Christmas morning, but not all of them will to their fullest. I wanted to be done with Christmas shopping by now, but I'm not. I wanted to have all the Christmas wrapping done by now, but it's not.
The fact is that I'm a bit sleep deprived and overwhelmed.
This month we have basically lived at the children's pediatrician office, and had a glorious trip to the ER to top it off.
Over the course of a month, my girls have had strep throat. Courtney needed stitches. And Madison has had crazy high fevers of 104 since Tuesday. We have made 2 trips to the pediatrician's office over the past couple of days, she has been swabbed for strep throat twice- which came back negative, and the best guess from the doctor is that she has mono. She will probably be sick on Christmas day. Needless to say, there have been many many many many sleepless nights and exhausting days at our home.
However, it could be worse, so I'm thankful to deal with what we are dealing with and I'm thankful that it's nothing worse. I feel so bad for my kids as they are the victims of the sickness and owies around here.
So, my Christmas wish is that my kids will all be well and cheery come Christmas morning, and we can all have a relaxed, much needed, laid back, glorious Christmas day remembering the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ.
I'm sure this will be my last post before Christmas, and maybe even before the New Year, so Merry Christmas to all and a Happy New Year!

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Sitting on Santa's lap

Last weekend we took the kids to see Santa! Santa sure was generous this year with the candy he gave out.
 Marshall and Madison didn't know what to ask Santa for. Courtney told Santa that she wants a dolly.
Merry Christmas! 

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Emergency Room

It's been hard to find the time or desire to blog the past little bit. Well I'm back and here is what's been going on.
Since Thanksgiving the girls have had strep throat. Courtney first then Madison. Strep throat and antibiotics are officially out of here. Whew!
The biggest thing that has happened is that Courtney had a fun night in the emergency room last week because she gashed her head open and had to get it stitched up. It was so sad.
That's 2 Emergency Room visits and 2 sets of stitches on the forehead this year. Marshall and Courtney are the not-so-lucky recipients of these events. Poor Madison was there when both of her siblings got hurt. She gets so scared with stuff like that. She has a great big heart and hates to see people get hurt. I was told that when Courtney got hurt, Madison ran into her Dad's bathtub, covered her eyes and started crying. When Marshall got hurt she cried and screamed louder than him. It just breaks my heart. She is such a loving and wonderful sister.
You can read about Marshall's stitches event HERE.
Anyway, we spent about 2 1/2 hours in the Emergency Room. They had to do a deep stitch below the outer layer of stitches. They did the dissolvable stitches (which I had to have my pediatrician take out), and they put steri strips over the top of the stitches. She had 5 stitches in that cute little head of hers.
When I saw her cut, I could see a hole. It looked like I could look into her skull. It literally tore through all of her skin and fat layers. She is one tough cookie who I love to pieces.
She was running and hit her head on the corner of a wall. Her Dad said it put a dent in his wall. My poor baby. I guess she didn't even cry at first.
Her stitches are now out and she is doing awesome. Her wound looks excellent! It is healing up great!
I never did get a day 1 photo. We didn't get home until about 11:30 that night. With it being such a long night, pictures were most definitely out of the question.

Day 2:

Day 5: Waiting in the waiting room of the pediatrician's office just before her pediatrician took out her stitches. Luckily I'm a paranoid Momma and took her to see her doctor rather than waiting for her stitches to dissolve. I was told that if I had waited, and her stitches would have stayed in longer, it would have probably scarred worse.
I love my kids' pediatrician.!

Steri strips are off and we are waiting in the office for the doctor to take her stitches out.

Day 8: This is how it looks today. Her bruise under her eye is still visible. Poor baby!

It is looking and healing great! I couldn't be happier with the results!
The doctor's advice is for the next year to keep out of the sun as much as possible or to have her wear a hat and put sunscreen containing 50spf or higher on her wound before going out in the sun because the sun will make the scar worse. Also, not to waste money on the over the counter scar cream, mederma, because it doesn't work any better than vaseline. And finally, put aquaphor on her wound like 6+ times a day for the next 6 months. That's why you can see the glow around her wound. We are keeping her wound all aquaphored up!

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Holding hands while sleeping

The other night while I checked on the kids, this is what I saw.......

 Madison and Courtney had fallen asleep holding hands. My heart just melted. I love the sisterly love.
I just had to take pictures.

Meanwhile, this little guy walked out in the hallway to see why my camera was flashing in is sisters' room. He is my night owl. Marshall usually takes awhile to finally doze off to sleep. He can be tired as ever and still be wide awake.

I must say, I have cute kids! They sure are fun!

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Our big 1 year!

Happy one year anniversary to Ben and I! It has been a wonderful year. Lots of changes have occurred:
*We bought our first house together
*We bought a new car
*We have a darling baby girl due to join our family in March
Just to name a few big ones.
Something that hasn't changed over the past year is that we have continued to raise the cutest kids EVER. Seriously. Cutest. Kids. EVER!! We are blessed!!

Ben has taught me more about life than I ever thought was possible to understand.
He has made me feel beautiful, strong, and worthy.
He has taught me what it's like to be treated like a lady; a truly magnificent lady.
He has taught me how to have more patience. Well, he and the children have taught me how to have more patience :).
He has taught me how to forgive. Not just other people, but how to forgive myself as well.
But, most importantly, he has taught me to enjoy the simple things in life.
He is kind, patient, loving, generous, playful, fun, geeky (which I love because I need someone to go with my geekiness side), and the best guy around.
I didn't know guys like him existed. I thought they only existed in dreams and Disney movies. Boy, was I wrong! He is here and proof that prince charmings do exist outside of books and fairytale stories. He is my prince charming.
One word sums him up: A.M.A.Z.I.N.G!!
So, Ben, thanks for being my truly charming and handsome prince. You rock my world.
Thanks for teaching me so much about the beautiful joys in life.
Thanks for always being my rock.
Thanks for spoiling me with the delicious breakfasts in bed, flowers, kisses, hugs, and love.
Thanks for allowing me to relax and take a breather as often as I need and as long as I need.
Thanks for the endless full body massages which are amazing.
Thanks for pushing me when I need to be pushed, and when life gets too tough, thanks for carrying me through the rough spots in life. You're always there helping me grow and get through those hard spots in life.
Thanks for never giving up on me. I know I'm not easy to live with at times, but you never complain and just compliment me on how you think I am truly amazing.
Thanks for your secret code 'I love you' hand squeezes to the kids and I. 
But, mostly importantly, thanks for being so amazing to the children. I love seeing their smiles and hearing their laughs daily. Seeing them enjoy their childhood to their fullest is truly the greatest blessing a mother could ask for.
Tonight, to celebrate our big 1 year, we are going to THE ROOF to eat dinner. Reservations are at 7. I'm so excited to dine while looking down at the beautiful temple lights and the beautifully lit temple grounds.
Afterwards we'll take a horse drawn carriage ride through the dashing streets of SLC.
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