Friday, January 18, 2013

Reaching perfection

I have one true desire for my life. It is to be the best wife and mother that I can possibly be. I often push myself beyond my limit. I work endless hours as a wife and mommy, often at the expense of my own nurturing. Sometimes I fear that I am failing and making too many mistakes, and that that I may not be doing enough in my role as wife and mother. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by the thought of this, and I let the tears start to flood down my cheeks. But then, with the tears still falling from my eyes, I look at my precious, happy, healthy, and content children and husband. In that moment I have a beautiful realization that my fear is true. I don't do enough, because enough for me would be perfection. I realize that I will never accomplish perfection, but that it's okay. I am doing a great job, and that feels great. Then and there I smile through the sting in my watery eyes because I know that I am doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing: learning and growing with my children and husband. Perfection was never meant to be reached here on earth. In the words of the beloved President Gordon B. Hinckley "Try a little harder to be a little better". That is what we need to be doing. Not wasting our energy beating ourselves up because we don't think we are good enough. My house may not always be immaculate like I hope. My kids sometimes have messy hair, dirty clothes, and dirt under their fingernails. Sometimes we eat doughnuts for breakfast. Sometimes I yell too much, cry too much, or complain too much. Sometimes I just get lazy and don't want to try in that moment. But the sometimes is the key word here.
My family and I are blessed. We are on the right path in life. And that, my friends, is what matters most.


Ashley said...

I know exactly what ya mean-I always feel guilty about lots of little things and that i am not good enough!!!! I am HORRIBLE when it comes to beating myself up. I am working on this and hoping to improve on finding those things I am good at..I feel like I'm still learning and finding out what those qualities are.

You are a great person. I enjoy reading your posts and know that you are so strong. I can feel your sweet spirit in your writing!! :) Keep up the good work!

Jamie said...

Awe thanks Ash!! You're so sweet :) Thank you!!
It is hard not to beat yourself up. I do it WAY too much. I guess with age comes wisdom. It is a learning process for sure. You are such a wonderful person! Thank you for your comments on my blog! I love love love reading them! :)

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